Mental Health Check in!

melanch0lic · Post by **melanch0lic** » 02 Apr 2021, 22:11

mental heath is at its lowest, haven't felt this bad in months and months (the last time I experienced this was just prior to joining these forums) and i don't know exactly how to handle it as i don't have anyone appropriate to talk to about things even though i need to, anyone i had faith in has either given up on me or have shown what their true intentions are/were so here i am left once again to try to deal with shit on my own ;__; i haven't got the strength to win this battle on my own but not even my family are interested in listening to me now as in their words 'the amount of medication you take and you -still- show symptoms? well that clearly isn't right, go back to the doctor' which i'm not going to do... today has been truly awful, mental health score is currently 1 out of 10, i feel genuinely broken especially now after the loss of certain people on here as friends - fml is all i can say, and all this cus i try to be enthusiastically pleasant to pretty much everyone ;o; sad, sad times

melanch0lic · Post by **melanch0lic** » 08 Apr 2021, 02:49

my mental health is thankfully returning to a state in which i can control the thought processes that usually keep me awake every night of the week, but i am feeling more myself as for the past 3 nights i've had about 6 hours a night, which is a lot for me! i hate not being able to fight the more difficult symptoms of my disorders, and having 4 different diagnoses makes managing them just that extra bit more difficult you know? >_< sometimes i think about how my disorders affect my life and they really do play an integral part in how i am with other people (like being super-anxious or wutever), how i react to certain situations etc. but i'm learning to accept that i have these disorders for life and will always be medicated for them, but it could always be worse :3 the support certain people here offer to me is more-than enough and thus i am eternally grateful for the fact that none of you really have given up on me, even though i most certainly am difficult to handle sometimes, your commitment to me as a friend and a confidant is noticed, it really is~ X3

Post by **lolin** » 08 Apr 2021, 03:03

i'm a mess :>

melanch0lic · Post by **melanch0lic** » 08 Apr 2021, 05:17

purple dragon wrote: ↑
08 Apr 2021, 05:07
i wonder if i should post about whats been on my mind today

why shouldn't you? speaking about what's been on your mind is exactly what we're here for & what this thread is all about - if what you want to talk about is private, feel free to drop me a PM or whatever and i'll try to offer advice or i'll just listen, it's completely up to you :3 <3

melanch0lic · Post by **melanch0lic** » 08 Apr 2021, 06:31

purple dragon wrote: ↑
08 Apr 2021, 06:20
tks

no problem @purple dragon, i'm online most of the day (when i'm not working) so i can talk whenever really, feel free to tell me to go away if you'd like some privacy but you've helped me in the past so i'd like to return the favour c:

Akane Mayu · Post by **Akane Mayu** » 08 Apr 2021, 08:46

Iv been thinking of my sexuality and gender identity and how I veiw myself

melanch0lic · Post by **melanch0lic** » 08 Apr 2021, 08:51

Akane Mayu wrote: ↑
08 Apr 2021, 08:46
Iv been thinking of my sexuality and gender identity and how I veiw myself

how do you feel when you look at yourself @Akane Mayu-chan? do you see something positive? :3

Akane Mayu · Post by **Akane Mayu** » 09 Apr 2021, 07:17

melanch0lic wrote: ↑
08 Apr 2021, 08:51

Akane Mayu wrote: ↑
08 Apr 2021, 08:46
Iv been thinking of my sexuality and gender identity and how I veiw myself

how do you feel when you look at yourself @Akane Mayu-chan? do you see something positive? :3

yes i do

melanch0lic · Post by **melanch0lic** » 09 Apr 2021, 10:20

Akane Mayu wrote: ↑
09 Apr 2021, 07:17
yes i do

well that's good to know, not enough people can honestly look at themselves in a positive light (like me, I genuinely hate mysel) so well done for that :3

Akane Mayu · Post by **Akane Mayu** » 10 Apr 2021, 01:20

Post by **lolin** » 10 Apr 2021, 23:19

Honestly gender is hard as hell to nail down

I'm pretty sure I want to be transfemme/female. I still sometimse have a flipflop in my head but at the end of the day I would rather be a woman.

Also I'm feeling moody tonight :<

Post by **LikkleMel** » 10 Apr 2021, 23:21

Lolin wrote: ↑
10 Apr 2021, 23:19
Honestly gender is hard as hell to nail down

I'm pretty sure I want to be transfemme/female. I still sometimse have a flipflop in my head but at the end of the day I would rather be a woman.

Also I'm feeling moody tonight :<

You are deffo feeling the female vibes if you are moody

Go grab some food or chill that helps with the moods ^_^

YouTube · Post by **Dark_** » 11 Apr 2021, 00:27

Honnestly i want food but cba going down stairs

Post by **lolin** » 11 Apr 2021, 02:29

LikkleMel wrote: ↑
10 Apr 2021, 23:21

Lolin wrote: ↑
10 Apr 2021, 23:19
Honestly gender is hard as hell to nail down

I'm pretty sure I want to be transfemme/female. I still sometimse have a flipflop in my head but at the end of the day I would rather be a woman.

Also I'm feeling moody tonight :<

You are deffo feeling the female vibes if you are moody Go grab some food or chill that helps with the moods ^_^

I got some food, thanks for the advice :>

(I know many transwomen go through period-like cycles and I'm beginning to think I'm one of them)

Akane Mayu · Post by **Akane Mayu** » 11 Apr 2021, 06:58

i agree with lolin that gender identiy and expretion is complex and can be hard to nail down