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melanch0lic
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Post by melanch0lic » 30 Apr 2021, 17:15

Dragoth wrote:
27 Apr 2021, 20:48
*waves*

Wanted to say thanks for being so welcoming. I’ve enjoyed reading your journal. Did you have a good day today?

Hello there Dragoth, there's no need to thank me however bro, I like to be friendly with anyone even remotely awesome and it's always nice to see new regular posters on here :3! As for my day, yeah it's been alright I guess; I've had the day off from work so I spent a large portion of my time with my sister (surprisingly enough as she's usually busy with work/her boyfriend), drinking coffee and eating American junk food which is always fun so time well spent imo! How about you? You been up to much today or do you have many plans for this bank holiday weekend? :nekothink:

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Seriously, I feel like I genuinely am becoming dependent on sugary foods even though before the last fortnight or so, I didn't really care much for food which, in one portion, has like twice the daily amount of sugar that's recommended... That, plus a lack of DDR, has meant that I feel slightly paranoid about my weight going up so I've joined a gym today! When I start going tomorrow I think it will do wonders for my mental health (as well as my physical health, obviously), without the use of even more medication and such... Speaking of which, I've had the 3 anti-psychotics I was prescribed change to 1 particularly strong type (Clozapine/Clozaril, I believe it's called) which is probably what has made my appetite for junk food reach levels I never thought were possible - ask anyone prescribed anti-psychotics (or anti-anxiety meds, like Xanax or Diazepam) and they will tell you all about how they increase your appetite, f**k... But I guess if they make me better then I can't really complain, I just wish sometimes I didn't have the conditions that I have as my life would be completely different if I didn't, but nevermind, it could always be worse! :3

As for this upcoming weekend, no plans have been made yet so I plan on watching the end of Gurren Lagann (AMAZING series, much love for Yoko <3) whilst finishing the boxes of American cereal that I've invested in (see the above picture - £6/7 a box but so worth it!), with occasional breaks for Honkai Impact which on my new PC is running like a dream - now all I need is a suitable monitor for it and I'm set for many sugar-induced shenanigans by finally joining the gaming community after taking such a long break from it ^^; OHOH one more thing - the raspberries I planted in my mum's garden have began to show signs of life so that's something to look forward to, eating the produce you've grown for yourself is so so satisfying <3 :nekothink: :nekothink:

TL;DR: American food is American, changes to my meds (FINALLY), sugar addiction, Gurren Lagann and my need for a PC monitor - I hope that's everything :3
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purple dragon
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Post by purple dragon » 01 May 2021, 01:26

melanch0lic wrote:
23 Apr 2021, 14:26
:nekothink:
melanch0lic wrote:
23 Apr 2021, 14:26
:nekothink:


im doing good and that smile makes me think of felix argyle from re zero

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Post by Naughty Kitty » 01 May 2021, 04:33

American food is for sure American. :sweatdrop:

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Post by melanch0lic » 01 May 2021, 17:34

purple dragon wrote:
01 May 2021, 01:26
im doing good and that smile makes me think of felix argyle from re zero

Same, there's definitely similarities between Felix and :nekothink: hence why it's my new favourite image - is it enough to beat -smugface-? Probably not but it's certainly up there! How are you anyways @purple dragon? Having a nice weekend so far? :3

So far I've spent most of today asleep(!) which is massively unusual for me - usually I only get around 2 hours of sleep a night but recently I've been getting a lot more, like 6 or 7 hours a night which makes me feel so much better, making the most of it while I can so in between games of Honkai Impact I'll be eating pizza (w/ garlic bread, obviously!) and napping :3 Happy days!
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Post by purple dragon » 02 May 2021, 00:29

melanch0lic wrote:
01 May 2021, 17:34
purple dragon wrote:
01 May 2021, 01:26
im doing good and that smile makes me think of felix argyle from re zero

Same, there's definitely similarities between Felix and :nekothink: hence why it's my new favourite image - is it enough to beat -smugface-? Probably not but it's certainly up there! How are you anyways @purple dragon? Having a nice weekend so far? :3

So far I've spent most of today asleep(!) which is massively unusual for me - usually I only get around 2 hours of sleep a night but recently I've been getting a lot more, like 6 or 7 hours a night which makes me feel so much better, making the most of it while I can so in between games of Honkai Impact I'll be eating pizza (w/ garlic bread, obviously!) and napping :3 Happy days!

my weekend is good so far hbu

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Post by melanch0lic » 03 May 2021, 15:34

purple dragon wrote:
02 May 2021, 00:29
my weekend is good so far hbu

My weekend was great, thank you for asking :3! I spent most of it chilling, playing Honkai Impact and eating American food so it was rather nice, I have today off work also so imma watch Mai HiME I think! What have you been up to? :nekothink:

As it’s raining I have spent most of the day in bed relaxing, it’s definitely overdue I’d say! Hopefully I can start my new job soon, I’ve had enough of Subway now even if the do provide my with free sandwiches D: I feel genuinely bad, however, as I’ve promised many people free meatballs and garlic bread so I hope whoever’s stalking me can make themselves known so I can feed them all the garlic bread that I can make, you all deserve it :3 Plus I want to finally do something which I’m passionate about, like helping people who really want to change would mean that my purpose in life is complete - I would die happy knowing that I’ve helped someone change their life for the better, even if the rehabilitation process is incredibly difficult! Helping people with their sandwiches is somewhat rewarding but it doesn’t make me feel fulfilled unfortunately, plus I would be making the most of my psychology degree meaning I didn’t waste 4 years in university! X3

Also I planted raspberries and blueberries in my mum’s garden which, with love and care, should grow into something special as there’s nothing better than eating produce which you’ve grown yourself, so I’ll be posting pictures to keep whoever is reading this updated ^^! Good times!
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Post by melanch0lic » 05 May 2021, 15:06

So I've been feeling somewhat stable over the past few days, but that coincides with the changes to my anti-psychotic medication - I'm now on just Clozapine for the paranoia/psychosis and already I feel positively different! I still feel slightly paranoid when outdoors however, but it's been much easier to manage recently, this is probably helped by the fact that I've been sleeping for 4 to 5 hours per night (over the space of 7 days or so) which is sooo much better than living on 1 or 2 hours, I mean I know that the insomnia will hit me again soon but for now I'm making the most of being in bed as I can actually feel the benefits of a good night of sleep :3 Life seems to be pretty good right now! My old best friend from university is coming to visit me on Saturday also, so I plan on taking us to Mount Fuji in Birmingham for some lovely Wapanese food and matcha lattés - easily my favourite place to eat and the waitresses are super-cute also! I'm surprised I haven't had a nosebleed whilst they've taken my order(s) as pretty girls make me nervous, oops... X3

TL;DR: new meds = better state-of-mind, sleep and my plans for a visit to Birmingham on Saturday! :nekothink:
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Lolin
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Post by Lolin » 05 May 2021, 17:15

Honestly that sounds lovely <3

Clozapine is a hell of a drug tho
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Post by purple dragon » 05 May 2021, 22:08

im glad u have been fealing stable

and also

-offers u hugs-

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Post by Akane Mayu » 05 May 2021, 23:51

sup
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Post by melanch0lic » 06 May 2021, 01:38

Lolin wrote:
05 May 2021, 17:15
Honestly that sounds lovely <3

Clozapine is a hell of a drug tho

thank you @Lolin, you have a habit of cheering me up when the lack of sleep gets me down, plz never change! :nekothink: also you're right about Clozapine but honestly, even though I've only been using them for like a week I can feel the benefits already - the level of paranoia/psychosis i was experiencing on my previous dose of anti-psychotics wasn't right so they clearly weren't for me, the only problem is the never-ending appetite D: srsly, i'm going to put on too much weight if I continue splurging at the new American shop i swear, those Trix have stolen my heart but they're going to be the end of me soon enough... :c

purple dragon wrote:
05 May 2021, 22:08
im glad u have been fealing stable

and also

-offers u hugs-

thank you once again @purple dragon, it's so nice to not feel overwhelming low or paranoid and now that i'm not spending all my time trying to fight my negative thoughts it has left me plenty of time for hugs and headpats so make your way to my apartment now plz :3

Akane Mayu wrote:
05 May 2021, 23:51
sup

hello @Akane Mayu-chan! nothing much tbh, i'm just chain-smoking whilst drinking root beer which happens to be an amazing combination c: i wish i was sleeping however, but i'm sure i'll get tired soon enough! how about you? have you had a nice day? c:

As for my latest update... I can't sleep so I'm hoping that I'm not going to spiral further into the bottomless pit which is my insomnia, I've been getting used to having between 4 to 6 hours of sleep a night so to take that away from me now would be incredibly cruel, but life has a way of challenging me like that ^^; I'm feeling strong enough to fight it however, I can't allow the insomnia or anything else for that matter to ruin the good mood(s) that I've been experiencing! I hope whoever is reading this is all good tho, I think I love you all <33 (this may or may not be serious, who knows :nekothink:)
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Post by melanch0lic » 06 May 2021, 01:39

Also for my American frens, check out this wall of goodness c:! If you see anything on there which you can personally recommend then I will take your advice on board and invest in some more of your junk food - however I can feel myself becoming hopelessly addicted to Trix and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, I'm fairly weak like that~ X3

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Post by Lolin » 06 May 2021, 01:43

Get some Ding-Dongs
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Post by Lolin » 06 May 2021, 01:43

Chocolate
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Post by melanch0lic » 06 May 2021, 01:45

Lolin wrote:
06 May 2021, 01:43
Get some Ding-Dongs

I spotted those yesterday but didn't give them much attention - are they better than the banana Twinkies, or should I invest in a box of both? They're like £5 per box (which I think is like, $7 or something?) so they're not exactly cheap, but if I'm going to put on weight due to the Clozapine then I'm going to do it in style :3

:nekothink:
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