Let me start off by introducing myself. my name is grace, or gracie as called by my friends, and I'm a 22 year old girl from the south of bristol, uk. I'm an avid dancer and hiker and I also enjoy cosplaying, gaming and appreciating art of all forms. After reading through the ALJ rules and regulations, I have decided to start a journal of my life, the highs and lows, the happy, the frustration, the realness that is me. If you'd like to comment on my journal or add in your opinions and input, then please feel free to do so, but I'd super duper appreciate it if no long conversations between people would take place!
Lockdown.
It's currently 10pm on the 20th of May and we've only just reached 2 months of being on lockdown. 2 months of lax lockdown isn't bad compared to other countries like Spain and France where they're only just being allowed outside to exercise, but I have to admit, I didn't realise how bad my mental health was until this. Before anyone starts with the whole 'dOnT sElF dIaGnOsE yOuRsElF', I have been officially diagnosed with clinical depression of September last year after suffering for 11 long years of severe depression and anxiety. Before September, yes, I was 'self diagnosed' but if you saw me and the state I was constantly in, you'd realise that, yes, I was horribly depressed. As much as I know why we're currently in lockdown and the fact that we've done it to save millions of lives, I can't help but wonder how people with mental health are coping. If I'm struggling to cope on antidepressants, I really feel for those who aren't on medications that are struggling. The main thing I'm struggling with, like everyone else, is not being able to see my 3 nephews, my niece, my boyfriend and my newborn cousin who is already 5 weeks old. I genuinely can't wait to see them once this is all over but it's hard not being able to see them... especially my boyfriend. We got together officially on the 17th of March after being internet best friends for just under a year. That was the first time we had met face to face after previous plans had fallen through. The week after was when we went into lockdown. We've spent our entire relationship confined to our houses, making memories through discord everyday. We've taken it upon ourselves to sleep on call with each other every night since we're unable to do it IRL. The part that's getting to me, is that he's currently in his last year of uni and working through his diss, and I'm unable to help him or distract him with a picnic or an hour worth of gaming to enable him to destress. I'm doing a mix of second and third year, still with massive uncertainty about my cancelled exams, and i feel stressed. I can't imagine what he's going through right now.
As much I want lockdown to be over, I understand why we're doing it. I want to help protect those who would be most effected by staying inside. I just don't know how long my mental health will be able to take it :/
wow, that was depressing for my first post. oops. I hope that everyone is staying well and healthy! We can do this guys, just a little longer!
Lockdown.
It's currently 10pm on the 20th of May and we've only just reached 2 months of being on lockdown. 2 months of lax lockdown isn't bad compared to other countries like Spain and France where they're only just being allowed outside to exercise, but I have to admit, I didn't realise how bad my mental health was until this. Before anyone starts with the whole 'dOnT sElF dIaGnOsE yOuRsElF', I have been officially diagnosed with clinical depression of September last year after suffering for 11 long years of severe depression and anxiety. Before September, yes, I was 'self diagnosed' but if you saw me and the state I was constantly in, you'd realise that, yes, I was horribly depressed. As much as I know why we're currently in lockdown and the fact that we've done it to save millions of lives, I can't help but wonder how people with mental health are coping. If I'm struggling to cope on antidepressants, I really feel for those who aren't on medications that are struggling. The main thing I'm struggling with, like everyone else, is not being able to see my 3 nephews, my niece, my boyfriend and my newborn cousin who is already 5 weeks old. I genuinely can't wait to see them once this is all over but it's hard not being able to see them... especially my boyfriend. We got together officially on the 17th of March after being internet best friends for just under a year. That was the first time we had met face to face after previous plans had fallen through. The week after was when we went into lockdown. We've spent our entire relationship confined to our houses, making memories through discord everyday. We've taken it upon ourselves to sleep on call with each other every night since we're unable to do it IRL. The part that's getting to me, is that he's currently in his last year of uni and working through his diss, and I'm unable to help him or distract him with a picnic or an hour worth of gaming to enable him to destress. I'm doing a mix of second and third year, still with massive uncertainty about my cancelled exams, and i feel stressed. I can't imagine what he's going through right now.
As much I want lockdown to be over, I understand why we're doing it. I want to help protect those who would be most effected by staying inside. I just don't know how long my mental health will be able to take it :/
wow, that was depressing for my first post. oops. I hope that everyone is staying well and healthy! We can do this guys, just a little longer!
