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    1. #31
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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Since my reviews in the review section is gone, going to post some I had backed up. Unsure of which version of the review it is. Going to start with Mirror's Edge.

      Mirror's Edge
      Xbox 360

      Graphics 1
      Sound 0
      Gameplay 1
      Fun 1

      Score 3/4


      Mirror's Edge is a jump, skip, and run along buildings that make heroes out regular people with each glanderous motion of the game. In this first person platformer turns the standard running and jumping, to and fro into a super power. Making the average daily grind the origin story for how normal person into can be a hero. This comes in the form of Faith a messenger taking messages from one here to there. Running along the wall like a messenger can. She comes off as the coolest thing since butter. Most of the game fallows this same flow of cool to watch, tough to pull off. Stemming from a lot of good ideas that simply weren’t executed properly every high is met with a low of flaws that keep it from being appreciated properly. Not all will give the game it deserves because of that, but those that do will find a game worth loving for a long time. It is certainly worth a rent to find out if a game you could love.


      Now there are many things to love from the game, most steaming from a platforming action game about running in first person. Now trading in the third person perception that is generally slated for any platform, for the first person perception leads to heart wrenching moments. Succeeding in sucking the player in, that every death is painful. The sense of your success or failure in simply jumping feels real. So when bullets are flying, dodging bullets by a faction of a moment leaves the feeling of defying death. Jumping from one point to another there is this flow to be found. Finding it leads to a sight to watch, and a joy of accomplishment. Each swing to a sway compose musical motion. Flowing note to note.

      Finding the flow is the pain that upsets the rhythm. Constantly in first person that allow for immersion into the game, confines the field of vision. Instead of being able to look where to jump, have to jump having faith there be something below. Hitting the ground causing skull fracturing from the lack of sight, or the over bright primary colors. The clean color choice of the environment is a welcome change of pace for the future, but ends up becoming a blur with over saturation of the same primary colors repeated about. This wouldn't be a big problem if there wasn't the additional blur of bullets, lights, and looking out for things to jump to so you don't die. With so much going on make it tough to pay attention to things, so that a simple think like a corner or a jump lead to the death. The death is more often from the controls not grabbing or running when needed.


      Having a good deal on screen leads to heart beating moments, so completing a challenge leads the body in full relief and joy. There are a lot of good moments that are challenging because of game not the flaws. Most come from simple environmental fights rather then a straight out boss fight. Sure, the standard boss match is peppered in for flavor, but they never feel like a boss battle. Which makes for an anti-climatic final boss. Even so, the game never sways from being enough of a challenge to feel like an accomplishment, yet never too hard to make it seem like it can't be done. Now the joys come hand in hand with pains. Which makes it fell realistic, since to pull off death defying actions, death has to be risked. In trying to do something new, they do pull off some neat things.

      Flawed as it may be, comes off as a good game in short spirits rather then hours on hours of playing. Most of the flaws go unnoticed then, and the game allows for this in its Time Trail mode. Pushes out the bullets and everything so you can just push away the bullets and story for fun of jumping to and fro. The story being pushed out of the way, is at times formulaic. Even so it comes off as enjoyable as summer blockbuster. Makes for a great rental, and for some this comes off as a good go to game when board as a reason of purchase. Entertaining as it may be, it is no more then that. Much like a popcorn flick, is fun and easy to get lost in. Might not be worth returning to after done with, and the main reason it is only a rental for some. Still it is worth a purchase to have something different on the shelf to go to, when your favorite genre of games get a bit stale. That way you can return to your favorite flavor with the same luster as before.

    2. #32
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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Kingdom Hearts Review

      Publisher: Square Electronic Arts/Disney Interactive
      Creator: Square
      Genre: Action RPG
      Platform: PS2
      Release date: 2002-09-17
      Review date: 2009-01-04
      Review by: Mykal Wane

      Gameplay 18/25
      Fun 20/25
      Sound 21/25
      Graphics 17/25
      Total 76/100

      Review
      At first glance it appears to be a fun raping of childhood memories by Disney using Square as the forceps. Kingdom Hearts is a fusion of Final Fantasy and Disney blended together for an action RPG filled fun romp threw childhood memories. A surprising blend since Disney hasn't made anything as decent since the childhood memories. Surves up this cocktail of bliss of a hack and slash and platforming hell.

      Starting off with some unknowns on a deserted island with a few inhabits there which works well after the freaky intros of Disney windowpane there is a slow day of wondering what else is out there and the escape to what else is out there. The elements of platforming action of jumping around and in your face button mashing action while searching for small items. Which starts out as reasonable in the game with a few items here and there with a small enclosed space. The game jumps back and forth between decent between hack and slash fun with magic when there is enemies and platform headaches of searching for hours for a single object. Finding a simple fish starting off is a pain since they can be only be found in a certain area which they swim about in. Sure the pain is rewarded with something wither it be the level moving forth or a simple item. Going threw the pain is there, enough to make many look for a walk threw simply out of frustrations of looking
      for three hours for a simple turn missed, or item missed. If there wasn't walking back and forth between places to get something this wouldn't be a pain in the ass.

      A saving grace is the music that is repeated to the point that a nail threw the head would be enjoyable is far more enjoyable then the nail threw said head. It is a bit upbeat and annoying at times, but the upbeat music is replace with ACTION, ACTION MUSIC. So the clash of keyblade against inventive enemies is high pace action of fun. It has the flaw of random enemies appearing at times for no apparent reason. The enemies pop up for you to knock down in a hack and slash format. The more you knock down the more experience is gained so for each ailment there is a reward with new moves and such. So the hours of looking for something is given a carrot to keep on going forth.

      The carrot of extra moves and items is the main reason of moving for the average story. It isn't the best in the world since it goes on a rather tired old format. Good friends become enemies one being good, and the other being corrupted into being evil while fighting over a girl that Sora the character is looking for. She gets taken away when the keyhole for the island home gets turn connecting it to other world letting in the enemies the heartless in. This spurs its destruction and the story of Sora, with Donald Duck and Goffy searching for the keyholes to lock up with the key blade. The levels themselves are a bit fun with the killing of the heartless, but to progress things along cause for backtracking back in forth for simple items. Each item is reward, sometimes with mini-games with Winnie the Pooh or health and the such. For the most part the only reasoning for getting to another world is to take on new boss battles that are more enjoyable.

      The getting to other worlds is another change in gameplay with first person shooter ship which you can modify and build new ship from the ones shot down. The multitude of gameplay elements such as it add up to be fun although one of an average game. The game is fun though there is not one thing standing out rather then the fun hack and slash fun mixed with RPG elements.

      Conclusion

      Kingdom Hearts is one of the meh games in that unless there is a real connection to it threw the Disney created childhood memories that are used to make a buck off. This is a game which many would either rent or pass all together. It is a good starting point and has many good elements in the game, but in the process of making this a buffet of quantity rather then quality they lost out in making this a stellar game. Many things could have been better story wise, but when reusing old things to create something new there is only so much one can do. This is the main reason it would fall flat without being a buy for many. The many insipid girls that watch the same old soap operas over and over again. They would love it because of the story tired storyline that meanders about. Works in loved worlds of movies like The Little Mermaid and Aladdin. Flaws that one may loath that others may love make this a game that is not really bad, or really good since there is
      no item by it self that stands out. Even flaws like backtracking to and fro for a single item or for the way to a boss battle may be nerve racking but there are people that love that kind of thing. The fun of hacking away at new and interesting creatures designs do make up for that. Just because the errors are made up for, don't mean that the game will be loved by all.

      Pros
      * Hack and Slash fun
      * Romp threw beloved worlds
      * Interesting enemies to fight


      Cons
      * Item collecting, and platforming headaches
      * the insipid storyline that manders about
      * BACKTRACKING

    3. #33
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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title: Gears of War 2
      Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
      Creator: Epic Games
      Genre: Shooter
      Platform: Xbox 360
      Release date: 2008-11-07
      Review date: 2009-21-08
      Review by: Mykal Wane
      Gameplay:17
      Fun: 10
      Sound:17
      Graphics:25
      Total:69

      Blood and guts of villains sliced up in a ballet of bullets and blades come sampled from the first Gears of War in small bits that are morsels compare to samples. Taking the good bits and trying for a grander scale. Where the first may have not been much, it did well at killing and nothing more. The sequel tries to do it and more. So instead of having a great product with little selection instead its delights come forth McDonalds’ style of variation. On what it offers up for consumption is lacking of any real quality or substance. This isn’t for a lack of trying. Trying with all there might, this is a little engine that couldn’t fallow its better brother to a watery grave instead of roller coaster heights of joy.

      Improvements do come as it tries to beat its better bother, though it is in parts rather then a grand old opera with blood and guts of dance at ever movement. The first Gears of War sets things up for a grand stage. A grand stand with great settings and graphical improvement that come with Gears of War 2, though the stage doesn’t change that much with the sequel. It uses the same gradual colors that blend together with better lighting to show how bland it is. The bland murk allows the blood to stand out a bit more with each paintbrush of the chainsaw. Other then throwing away the flaws of the past, it is kept as a badge of honor from the start of the revving chainsaw into the enemy until the massive explosion at the end. Along with the lack of color in this abysmal world is the attempt at horror for majority of the game brought by being in the dark when things go bump in the night. A good example is while heading to the digs spot where Dom and Marcus,
      the main characters, have to go threw a tunnel with a light from the tip of where the characters are moving. While moving the creatures known as Tickers, enemies that explode, run at the characters. Ooh things coming from the unknown that is real scary. While the dumb and easily excited cry out for there binky, others will be board with this. Especially after the fact the tickers doing it in a well lit area while being shot at most of the entire area. The fact that it is dark and things can go boom without notice is something that didn’t work well in the first one. The fact that a character was being swarmed with enemies about at every turn with little break between each wave of enemies with a story just moved from point a to point b was a staple that made the first one so great. The pacing being the key, it is something that couldn’t be kept in the second game. Breaking things up for story, which was more of a whine tasting to ears then anything
      worth caring about.

      This could have worked if there weren’t the attempts at making everything grander in scope. Mainly because of the rail shooting sections that are done while viewing what could have been passing by. Being a view that characters are placed in something that they can only shot from not move. So the duck and cover system that was great goes out the window because of this. Taking away the staple of what makes the game fun, gets knocked out of the park for a view that causes more headaches then anything else. It allows for more enemies to be placed on screen because of this, but that means you can only munch them up. The more enemies are good idea; the fact that the Bromaces that are so tough to take on is ridden near the end was cool. The problem was that to get to one ounce of joy, with 10 pounds of fat has to be chewed up first. The fat of this being nails, and compose of movement that makes every turn of the wheels hell is being push in under the nails
      yelling “THE SONG THAT GOES ON AND ON MY FRIEND IT IS NEVER ENDING SONG” over and over because the idiot AI can’t drive worth a damn. So when given a chance at the wheel of controlling the beasts that been attacking most of the game becomes boring. Just moving the body and shooting without worry of being hurt takes a lot of the fun out of it. When the worry about getting hurt is in, the gameplay is so frustrating with the ass hat of the AI thinks driving into the enemy is coming. So when waves and waves of enemies come forth, the only thing you can do is shoot waiting for it to die. The story fallows the same idea. Epic try to give Gears 2 some dept, with having Dom whining, bitching, and crying about his wife. Mostly Marcus is going with Dom since at times it leads to more killing. The whole deal with it’s perks at killing things is ok, but the main story just ask a lot of questions with no real answers so there be high demand for the next one.
      The question to why were these creatures made, why is the bodies of the bad guys act all funky with the oil, the emulsion in the game, why is there a building to go threw with experiments of the enemies, just being on the short list driving this short bus of questions.

      The points where it should be a grand old time near the end, feel more like a push over. A very anticlimactic end which things kind of fissile out for the most part. The game feels like there is no real challenge. It might be that to get to the point where there is any challenge one has to go threw the hardcore mode. This is rather pointless because of the ease of hardcore. Compared to the first one hardcore is easy. Anyone who really enjoys the difficulty will find it a pain just to beat the game just to find the fun version of it. Much like filling out taxes before you can eat a cake; the pain of taxes for the cake never feel like it wasn’t worth it.

      With a case like that for the main single player mode, the online portion must make it worth the selling of one’s soul. It surely must have some challenge if the AI isn’t. Well with Gears 2 new things of chain saw duels, using a foe as a shield, and new weapon should be a barrel of blood soaked fun. It is with things like horde where your friends and you play together to take on waves of enemies. This one bit was done grand with beauty of the world shown as blood soaked chainsaw grinding them down as a buddy covers you paints a beautiful art of bullets and blood which the main game should have been. While the online is fun it almost makes up for the game. The ranking system as flawed as it may be, chainsawing a dumb sniper is worth it. The fact one can place grenades as mines to trap someone who is chasing you is great.



      Conclusion

      Gears of War 2 in small ways is an improvement over the first one. While overall is a poor fallow up. Most will probably say that this is a great game because of the small bits that are good rather then the whole product. Though if one is going in for the multiplayer and has the cash this is a good investments. This is said since most people that play online get in to there games as most would do when in a good girl. They get in and stay there for a good long while, and when it is fun who can blame them. Those that find enjoyment out a good shooter I would suggest going for the first one over the second one. Not the greatest thing out there, but Gears of War 2 is the rebound. Wanting more out the first one, though it isn’t good as the first one. Usually the case, the second can’t even pass for the first one. So most will rent it, find it fun, and then go back to the first one till Gears of War 2 is in the bargain bin when it is cheap. It may be a
      good gal, but it isn’t worth the full price tag when it can’t pull off the same great experience as the first one.

      Pros
      Ride a Bromac into battle
      Chainsaw Duels
      Hordes Mode


      Cons

      Rail shooting frustration
      Clucky Controls on vehicles
      Story makes no sense

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Game: Little Big Planet
      Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
      Creator: Media Molecule
      Genre: Platformer, Action
      Platform: Playstation 3
      Release date: 2008-10-27
      Review date: 2008-11-28
      Review by: Mykal Wane

      Gameplay:18
      Fun: 20
      Graphics: 19
      Sound: 23
      Total: 80


      Little big Planet is the video game equivalent of Legos when put into a nutshell. Just like Legos when cracked from the box the game starts you with the preset way first to figure out how things work. That way the imagination can come forth out of the pieces to form whatever is wished. The cute music fallows the line of being instrumental pieces that make the frustration of going the preset enjoyable threw tough puzzles the platform gives.

      The puzzles may be as simple as timing the jump to get from point A to point B. This is a point that is rather difficult because of the physic engine is rather a bit lose. Itís a bit cartooney in itís not quite 3d form. The cartoony physic works with itís scale most of the time. The scale takes from the aspect that it is big for your character so that a skateboard for example is rather large for your character. So when it stops it flings your sack of a character threw the air. Each item having itís own physics to work with since it differs from shape to shape. Old ideas that many have seen time and time again in Legos and other items brought into the light of video games.

      Bring back to the Lego analogy, that everything is something to build on. The game has a real heart to it, since the character is yours to build with what you gain. Which is the real moving point for people to play threw the game. It allows you to have more to build which your own level after beating each level and getting each item. Which will faults at times when you have to jump or time how you move. This can be really nerve racking since it is a matter of getting a jump at the exact point and time risking death or die. It makes the rather simplistic a complete head ache with the happy sounding notes to commend for every attempt. The music enjoyable as the happy melodies are being loop become annoying pokes in the eyes with the pat on the back they give. Lovingly as a mother bird would keep pushing her young out of the tree for every fall to the ground with the phrase ďYou can do itĒ the music plays. The fun that came before becomes an effigy of hatred in these tough spots. Depending on the type of gamer you are, this kind of thing in the game becomes this pain in which there is no return except the return for a refund.

      Those that can barreled through are rewarded with more items to work with, and more fun from the cartoonish physics that causes so much pain before since at times works and sometimes it doesnĎt work as it should. The main game is mainly a preset to go threw so you can get more pieces to play with. Now add in that the levels can be created, can be uploaded threw the Playstation Network and download new ones that others created there is no limit to what can be done.

      The main game simply serve as something to get new pieces and levels to work with as well as new items to work with. The items are interesting since they introduce new types of items such as wood and stone which have there own way for how it works. Harking back to the days when many played with legos when now few do, the game does a quality job of that. It creates a great set up for players to create whatever they want with the pieces. Fun since there is no main goal then collecting stuff so you can build with them.

      Conclusion

      Little Big Planet brings presets that work that bring fun and pain with each level. A game that is worth buying a Playstation 3 for alone if you have internet connection since it is one of the most replayable games. Given the fact that like legos youíre given the pieces and some presets to figure out how things are done. After that it the limit is not your imagination, but the limit of everyone on the Playstation network imagination. A game that many may buy the Playstation 3 alone for once past the frustration. For some gamers the frustration of the games physics will make this a jolly good rent since they see the frustration of a not quite 2d or 3d environment, the shine of the objects that blind, and the annoyance of the happy music that gets loop. Just be careful with what is downloaded because there is way to many penis creations out there then needs to be for an E game.

      Pros

      Innovated Lego fun
      Each item has itís own properties
      Limitless fun


      Cons

      Cartoon physics that arenít always the same
      Difficulty curve menders about
      The not quite 3d or 2d environment

    5. #35
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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title Murakumo: Renegade Mech Pursuit
      Manufacturer: Softwear
      Publisher: Ubisoft
      Platform: Xbox
      Genre: Shoot-'Em-Up game
      Rated: T
      Date Release: 2003-03-01
      Date Review: 2008-09-05
      Review by Mykal Wane



      Overall Rating 1/5
      37/100
      Gameplay 4/25
      Fun 12/25
      Sound 6/25
      Graphics 15/25



      With a name Murakumo which means "Gathering Clouds" or "Cluster of Clouds" made by the guys that bring kick ass Mech games like Armored Core you think you would be getting a great game. Though unforchantly it has the same problem of fast action and nothing else. You are a mech that speed past shooting stuff up in the same repetitive background over and over while dodging rockets and bullets over and over again. Much like Nascar with guns you blow stuff up while going round and round.

      Now this cause for some fun this is fun and priced at 2 bucks used at Gamestop you will have your hearts delight. Though that 2 buck price tag becomes easily explained when you start up the game. The controls themselves are fairly simplistic, and at the speeds your mech is going it is for good reasoning. Having more complication the more stuff you run into at high speeds that can only meet the illusion of Speed Racer. Going in a strait line while you are dodging bullets from all angles is a pure impossibility. Though other then moving right or left a bit, the rest is very clunky and can’t turn on a dime. Having a rocket that accelerates you for a bit is insanely fun, though the fun is rather limited since it sputters out after projecting you in a single path. This won’t of been a large problem if the game allowed for you to have some distance and fly about to catch your foe of woe that flies a set path which if you don’t keep up with you fail the mission. Creates much woe to flow, or flying of cursing that would make a sailor blush in pure frustration. One might think oh that is just one or two missions getting in. A mission set up often has these faults of not keeping with them, but there is some cool missions involved where you get to see something blow up in Technicolor. A third rate explosion from Fox on a 64 could beat the explosion of the catch and destroy missions.

      Simple pains here are not simple since coming from guys of greatness seems to be a great attempt at a pile of shit. The controls themselves are at a best clunky. Going horizontal or vertical being your only sure fire ways of flight while you are unable to fly correctly. Turning right or left when in the fumes of your enemies is impossible along with the fact firing seems to be off by half a click. So mashing down a single button for 30 minutes firing at one target doesn’t do the job with a weapon. Weapons you are given sure fire hit that is very weak if you don’t miss because you are trying to avoid being shot to hell by random fire from rogue AI which is the ever incoming thing you are trying to kill and the once in a good while big shot. Since the simplistic game play makes all points of pure shit magnified since you don’t have good gameplay that last more then a few minutes unless you have the memory of a gold fish where being lost on to how things are makes the whole thing fun.


      Conclusion + wrap up

      Each mission it self is a deal of pick the mech that works and shot shit. No real challenge other then figure out that. Repetitive action with no real amounts of fun or excitement then when you first playing the game. Now the only charm or worth this game might be is to the beer drinking racecar fan that thinks “HULK SMASH” is a literary line of art will love this game. Now odds are you can get them a Nascar game for the same price for like Madden another pile of shit usually get shitted out enough that it is a cheap fun enjoyed by these idiotic fans that they will be happy. If you every get this game, play it drunk. For that is the only way you can get fun for more then the time it takes to figure out the controls.






      Pros

      It’s fast
      Shooing stuff up
      Speed Racer speed while you blow stuff up

      Cons

      Clunky controls
      Crappy AI for all
      Hammer in the head is a more enjoy repetitive action
      Last edited by Mykalwane; 09-16-2012 at 10:38 PM.

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title Mass Effect
      Manufacturer: Biowear
      Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
      Platform: Xbox 360
      Genre: Action role-playing game
      Rated: M
      Date Release: 2007-11-20
      Date Review: 2008-08-30
      Review by Mykal Wane
      http://i236.photobucket.com/albums/f...x_art_flat.jpg


      Overall Rating 3/5
      56/100

      Gameplay 15/25
      Fun 20/25
      Sound 6/25
      Graphics 15/25


      Mass Effect is not as advertise a sex filled gun tour of the universe of originality in a sandbox of choices. It is more of a chose your own adventure which is linear and has few choices with repeative actions in faults while it treads old water poorly. Now unlike with Jade Empire where there tread where they had gone before so they could excel in writing and fun Biowear goes the route of the masses in having as much writing as a English major and the deep of a box cover.

      Now not to say there isn’t fun to be had as the intergalactic Shaft. With every height there is something else that gives you the shaft. Starting out you have a lots of options in for how scruffy looking or pretty you want your character to be. Problem is that the face is the only thing you can edit, and any chance of immersion by name is shoved under for a quiet end with everyone calling you by the force last name Shepard. You have a one in three choice of where you were from that do little to change things up. Choice are much as that, and unlike in previous ones where you choice what was said you only choice the intent. Things rarely change from the few choices that you do make as you go off to protect the universe. Starting off very small where you go after a distress signal that leads to a beacon the main bad guy is after, setting this up for generic robot soldiers known as the geth and electric zombies they create known as husks. The bad guy kills the tough high ranking rouge special agent while figuring out what the beacon is. So you go revoke the bad guy’s high ranking and become Shaft the bad mother watch your mouth of the universe and go about kicking ass with your rag tag team.

      Now for some this would sound very generic sci fi movie of the week and in many ways it is. There are the race of space sluts, you have the race of angry kill them, and races
      Of general stereotypes that give the impression that we left earth to find meteoricicy. Now this and many things may go unnoticed because of the amount of dialogue for everyone. Going for the quantity over quality for writing. Simply because of that you have tons of life stories that it seems like there is a lot. Now to the average first person shooter junkie this may appear to be a masterpiece of writing which Biowear may of made some cuts to appeal for them. A good example is Tori (Marina Sirtis) as the space slut race villain. Each place feels big but if you try to get into every nick and cranny it is just a very big confine space. In Jade Empire there were able to do this and over come it by saying it was a town you were visiting. Each world may of felt a bit confiding but felt larger then it was. Now each planet you go to that is along the storyline feels like this, with the worlds that are off to the side for some sandbox fun aren’t. It might be the fact that you have to transverse these worlds on a tank that moves like a wandering cow which you are forced on many occasions to use and blow shit up. The ice planet you take on the female space slut voiced by Sirtis is the best example of it, and the fun the game has. For Shaft bangs around shooting his load blowing off the heads of geth. Proving you’re a bad ass mother fucker and you’re not taking any shit.

      The lack of story is made up time after time by moments where you get to shot the hell out of the dumb asses and feel like you will crush all you oppose. This fun is top notch, but it gets pushed aside by everything in the way. The fun is in bits and pieces but to do a lot of it you have to ride one of the slow ass elevator keeping the pacing of the game from a slow crawl of a slug to bad ass of the universe which makes the game a bit of a grind of a game to get the experience by talking to people and the such to be more of a bad ass of the universe or the godly knight that saves the universe by slaying the fools of the world.


      Conclusion (Short recap + Pro and Con)
      So you got a grinding for level choice your own adventure. This may be very incomplete and filled with flaws because it is the first of a trilogy, even so the fun you get out of the game is much the same you get out of a Shonen anime. Boobs, actions, and as much fun as a quality pop corn flick. It feels more like the Madden of RPGs where you have a fun product with a lot of flaws like lens flairs that kill many beautiful scenes along with the chance of boobies from the PG-13 sex scene which is the only reason for the M with no language or blood heck it seems more like it got a M rating for additional sales. A poor AI where your comrades can’t do anything to help you so you are alone and crappy mechanics which are minded for the fun for kick ass fun.


      Pros

      Fun of living a sci fi movie
      Shooing stuff up
      Being an intergalactic Shaft

      Cons

      Lens flair killing sights
      Crappy AI for allies vs. foes
      You are forced to drive shooting cow

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title Too Human
      Manufacturer: Silicon Knight
      Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
      Platform: Xbox 360
      Genre: Action role-playing game
      Rated: T
      Date Release: 2008-08-19
      Date Review: 2008-09-19
      Review by Mykal Wane
      http://i236.photobucket.com/albums/f.../Too_Human.jpg

      Overall Rating 3/5
      65/100
      Gameplay 10/25
      Fun 20/25
      Sound 16 /25
      Graphics 19/25

      Too Human, right off hand you can know it has to be a lot of good inside to start off with an insult. For the it’s insult it is because the most part the game falls under the dead rights flaw. Just so you can keep on page by what I mean is Dead to Rights is a game that offer a whole lot, but simply because it had a lot to do can’t do a lot right even though it is a lot of fun. Too Human does come by this flaw in the demo and in the finished product. Each class starting out has many tweaks so you got one that fits you like a glove character. Fallowing under the no glove no love rule of RPGs, every little thing about the character can be tweak till you’re gitty as a school girl figuring out there’s rumble in her controller.

      The use of it is much more problematic. In trying to solve the problem of worrying about the camera you have a jittery farce of bare compliance which leave you for a ball room blitz of action with the use of the right analog stick for direction weapon flow. Which in it’s own right is a lot of fun at start, kind of why the demo was so much fun. Now the problem is that the difficulty in shooting strait or the blade smacking the guy that is in front of your character because the game wants you to have the ballroom blitz fun and difficulty by going for the one furthest away. With the camera stuck in a cinematic mode which is less then functional. Sure it shows the beauty and awe of how large the surroundings are as you are destroying your foe, but this ends up with the death of a thousand cuts. Many of times the big troll, elf, whatever it might be is secondary in worry over tiny blows that you will end up getting from the small little guys that will swarm you. The amount of them would not be a problem if you felt like a god. For the simple idea of that your enemies grow with you so there is always a challenge does sound good in theory. It was the main reason of playing after trying out the demo.

      In practice you have this blood thumping action that never lets up. This means you got to be in there for the long haul. Since every attempt to fight the game seems to be against you. This may be from the thought that in Gears of War you are given great amount of difficulty and is a lot of fun because it works on simple parts. Shooters like to shoot so going all out to make this fun and challenging. With every chance to kick ass or die. Now it worked for Gears, makes sense that it worked in the shooter blend why not in the hack and slash RPG of epic portions. Too Human gives that, but to do so you have to have a camera that works against you, a loot system working against you, and thousands of enemies against you leads to a difficult fight.

      For a poor gamer that means you die a lot, which kind of kills the challenge. A valkyrie comes down to collects the dead body in an unskipable bit when resurrected a few feet away from the fight. This sucks, and is a pain in the ass. So you try not to die, but in the act of getting resurrected every time kind of kills the point of death. Which depending on how well your character chosen fits you will be a lot. Coming back from the no glove no love. A glove fit of love is needed. If you can not find the character that fits you as a player this game will not be fun. It will be frustrating hell since the game is unforgiving. When high in health, health orbs are easy to come by, when you are low on health credits and items blossom out fully and hairy as man boobs. This will be pointed out since when after getting killed by the one arrow that is out of sight since the camera would rather show you the most beautiful piece of actuarial pipes then all the enemies. Naturally you’ll come back to beat the shit out the guy to get the health. This is something that has happen to me every time I have died in the game was because of the death of a thousand cuts. Those small blows that don’t matter as you fight on threw the rile fight of fickle matter while you take out the giant troll in glorious detail. Moments like these are tidbits of glory in the see of mechanical blood that dissipates.
      Conclusion (Short recap + Pro and Con)
      Too Human gives the illusion of being a god in moments of sweet blood. A bad ass with no emotion or any facial movements even when you take on the man who murders your wife, but no god of battle taking on equal foes. Glory of battle is yours, taking on titans of camera and auto aim. Every sweet foe devour, is delightful at the cost of a meiotic game that turns glory into repetitive pains in death. Death that matters not in the search for glory. Is this game bountiful slices of enjoyment, nay is only a partly potion. A game which to be heaven to some is hell to others. Which to dine on for a time as a rent would be divine. A simple morsel of delight, but if purchase has replayablity of a thousand folds since it can be change to fit your needs. A game where you can set it up so it fits like a glove for a lot of love.


      Pros

      Glory of battle alone or with a friend
      Tons of customization
      Heart pulsing action
      Tons of replayablity

      Cons

      Concept of no worry camera leads to shit for eyes camera
      Loot system is messed up where rewards health if doing good
      Death by a thousand cuts
      Repetitive gameplay

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title Fable: The Lost Chapters
      Manufacturer: Lionhead Studio
      Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
      Platform: Xbox
      Genre: RPG
      Rated: M
      Date Release: 2004-09-14
      Date Review: 2008-10-18
      Review by Mykal Wane


      Overall Rating 3/5
      79100
      Gameplay 17/25
      Fun 23/25
      Sound 17/25
      Graphics 22/25

      (500 word min)
      A fable is a grand tale that brings on images of blood and honor like the tales of Beowulf or Arthur. In this hack and slash action RPG you get it in buckets of blood and buckets of fun. The story itself is rather simplistic in it’s base like most story, you’re someone special so someone kills your family because of it. From there you branch out on your way to figure out who as well as get stronger so you can get revenge. To get stronger you take on missions from the hero’s guild so you have a reason to go from one place to another killing everyone if you wish or saving everyone.

      This little thing is the true charm of the game is it leaves things up to the player to do what they wish while giving some direction so you’re not completely bored. Now the reasoning for the rather simplistic storyline is you have lots of choices. The choices are rather linear like a choice your own adventure book, but each choice has an effect. This comes from something as simply as if you want your character to bulk up in magic so you can roast someone one alive you use more magic. Kill innocence and be a villain or save them from the villains, either way it is reflective on your character. Things from getting drunk a lot or getting injured a lot it would have an effect. With each event there is a matching sound, which is worth just letting your character stand and listen to it for a while quality.

      Though sound is not top notch, it does what good sound should do blend in with it all. It doesn’t stand out and becomes annoying. As annoying as the stand out ones are they usually have moments where they kick ass because they stand out. Kingdom Hearts is a good example where the music stands out while blending most of the time. This may be because Fable goes the route that is usually not taken with a full orchestra which a good example of this is the stellar opening theme composed by Danny Elfman. Though the quality isn’t keep because they need something that blends better which Lionhead’s Russell Shaw who has a history with Lionhead with past titles like Black and White. So it does a grand old job of doing the job. Just other then the main theme song none stand out.

      Graphically it does stand out at times, at times it is just so damn pretty for a Xbox game. Makes you think it jumped ship to it’s brother on the 360. This all depends on the lighting to the area, it appears chunky monkey at times. Which is a nice way to counter the problem of Xbox graphics. Now the lighting at times is a double edge sword since the world changes by the hour, so the lighting does since it does in real life with the sun. So the graphics change from kick ass to chunky monkey. Rather interesting since like the first Doom introducing lighting does a lot though it is rather simple idea.

      A simple idea in the story and AI as well. The main reasoning behind the low IQ on their smarts is that the simplisticity of combat of a hack and slash action blended in with spells and arrows is a grand old time. More often not in the simplistic action though repetitive is fun. Fun and choice are rather simple ideas that harks back to the 32bit days of maybe not the best quality in the world but the most fun in the world with games like Sonic. With the blend of tongue in cheek humor of the British Isles they hail from with dialogue of the non playable characters(NPCs) and with games like Chicken Kicking. The game is fun, in short amount is one of the best games out there. Maybe that is the market it is made for, but if you are playing the game hours on end it can become a bit tedious with the repetitive gameplay. The gameplay is fun, same as it was with Sonic and Mario just like they were repetitive it was fun.

      The core of the game is simplistic fun fallowing the generic hero storyline that most fables have. Though repetitive action against dumb enemy AI for the most part, you have choices for all. It is choices in a GTA sense in that there is a main storyline to fallow or just have fun as well as choices within that. Growth with every choice you make, and lost of choices. Which make it a lot of fun, and has a lot to love. The Lost Chapters is version contains a few things the first Fable didn’t have like a Pimp hat you can get along with extra bosses to fight like a dragon. Small little differences of extra items, but the core of the game is much the same. Since the Lost Chapters version just contained what the PC version had. The fun had with the extra surprise inside make it a good buy over the original. The original is good, but the extra stuff is worth the extra couple of bucks to pick it up. One really isn’t better then the other, just that one has more bang for your buck then the other. Fable the original game is out on the Xbox Live Marketplace, and a worth while buy even if it isn’t the Lost Chapters version with the humor and fun inside both Fable. Each a fable of the players that at the end being good or bad doesn’t really matter, just your choice at the end for the good, bad, or neutral ending. Even so Fable, is the players own fable of fun.




      Pros

      Lots of choices with effect
      Growth with what you use
      Fun in game things like Pimp Hat
      Tongue in cheek humor


      Cons

      simplistic story
      Dumb Enemy AI
      Repetitive gameplay
      Generic Hero Story

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title : Jade Empire

      Manufacturer: BioWear
      Publisher Microsoft Game Studios
      Platform: Xbox & Xbox 360
      Genre M
      Date Release 2005-04-12
      Date Review 2008-06-31
      Review by Mykal Wane

      Gameplay 17/25
      Fun 18/25
      Sound 18/25
      Graphics 15/25

      Main Story

      Jade Empire starts out with an old but good premise same as Lucas Arts of stealing from the old myth and lore of China’s old history and mixing it up with something of there own. Makes complete sense to go to the source material after plunging into the depths of crap filled Star Wars and coming up with a gem. Biowear plunges into the world of another to pull out there own world to play with. Know starting off with the mixture of old and new you have the choice of balance or great power which mean absolute nothing if you spend your experience in what you feel like works. You have a heavy hitter which is slow or the quick and nimble types to start off, but with just the simply understanding of moves you have the power to kick ass since you are the one with a destiny.

      Some might think what the hell this is the same old storyline of Star Wars with kung fu fighting with this, in many ways it is. Biowear not wanting to have to deal with the fact that whole come up a completely original idea for a story but have kick ass fun in instead. To a point you be right since at the start you kick the shit out a whiney piece of shit that complains that you aren’t the best because of the fact your family didn’t fuck each other. Which for a start up of having to learn how to do some simple moves by beating the shit out him is rewarding. You learn to use the force, I mean “magic” and others things as you progress from this Chinese Fable of keeping the earth safe by beating the shit out of the bad guys since they burn down your home. Now what you having in a lack of story telling that is rip from others is decent characters. No matter who you choice and how you play the game you have character development that will real you in with romance fighting for the gal or guy of your dreams while fallowing the mystery of who took your master. Which is more fun going after then it seems since it goes on a slow burn.

      Now all is reasoned because to get to A you need to get B and you have to do C to get B to do A thing. For example you fallow after the bad guys that burn your village in a barrowed flyer so you crash land in a place and try to find a way so you can. Fallowing the clues of the Death’s Hand along the way you get a flyer and someone who can do the job right. It leads in getting side scrolling shooter as you travel to a location Now to get there you have the choice system that Biowear love to use for conversations. Each have there own outcome which goes for something much more different from the light vs. dark route. Much of the game places emphasis on the two major philosophies, the Way of the Open Palm and the Way of the Closed Fist. The paths are similar. So one who follows the Way of the Open Palm is not necessarily good, and one who follows the Way of the Closed Fist is not necessarily evil.

      The "Way of the Open Palm," the key to maintaining the universe is by being in harmony with nature, one's surroundings, and one's station in life. As an effect of being in nature with one's surroundings, one is expected to actively assist in lessening the chaos in the area, through the assistance of lessening burdens. While this seems "Peaceful", the Way of the Open Palm is strict in another form: one should not act outside their station and purpose in life. In some things it means sacrificing someone in exchange for another to live. The stick in the mud that thinks of the good of the nation over the person basically. Just cares if the end justifies the need.

      The "Way of the Closed Fist," on the other hand, the purpose of life is to follow the ways of serving oneself — to face one's challenges head on, challenge one's station in life, and work to become self-reliant. The emphasis of the Way of the Closed Fist is combat, turmoil, and constantly challenging oneself, which is why many of those who are evil tend to be considered to follow the Way of the Closed Fist, in that they bring about chaos in the universe. The guy who bashes his way threw people to save someone.

      So you have the what works best kind of choices that are tougher to figure out what is good or not. You don’t have a good or a bad, heck even the bad guys aren’t completely bad. There action just are for the most part. This murky water of what is and isn‘t right as you fight puts it above in the choices. Now the choices as you fight give you tons of options here. Now the game has the fault of being too short because of it, where the whole of the game feels short because of the options to play it.

      Conclusion (Short recap + Pro and Con)
      Thought the game as a whole may be short you have this kung fu action rpg that plays like a let’s base the bad guys to pieces game while trying to be a Zelda game. You have what is an average game that tries to do more then it can. It is fun, you have a lot of choices, and a worthy rent. In some aspects the game in repeated action that is fun and draws you in. A story that may not be epic, but makes you feel legendary fighter like Bruce Lee while you save the world with your magic and transforming spells to save gods. The game is a bit average in the mechanics of the game, but for some it slam it’s fist into your heart.

      Pros

      Kung fu fighting and magic combine
      Lots of choices that lead to lots of endings
      Balance fighting

      Cons

      Easy fights to the end
      Story seems like it has been told before
      Camera leads to missed enjoyments in battle and in cinema.

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Title Aegis Wing
      Manufacturer: Carbonated Games
      Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
      Platform: Xbox 360 (XBLA)
      Genre: Action
      Date Release: 2007-04-16
      Date Review: 2008-05-25
      Review by Mykal Wane

      Aegis Wing


      Overall Rating 3/5

      Gameplay 21/25
      Fun 24/25
      Sound 17/25
      Graphics 12/25
      (500 word minimum)
      There was a time where a quarter could buy a time of desire. The joystick and a couple of buttons were all that was needed for a day of pleasure. As with all thing changed a once common reality changed into a dream of the past. Aegis Wing is in some aspect is that. In the Japanese population make a side scrolling shoot that test your every reflex kind of way it is. It is a kick in face of remembrance of what side shooters were with each death. This is something that will come often since it falls in the bullet hell sub-genre of side shooters. Now for those that are a bit adrift on what that means, it’s about the same as it raining lasers. The raining lasers bit adds to the idea that you are a lone pilot taking on an Alien armada to restore the planet. In your path you will be avoiding lasers, asteroids, and kamikaze ships out to get you.

      Now this fallows along the same idea as Megas XLR in the fact this is Americans doing something they love that is a bit Japanese and adding there own spin on it. The game does fallow same style as bullet hell in that it is tough as hell to get threw since you are getting fired on by things that are increasing in number as well as weapons as you progress threw the game. Some might be going I am not going threw a game that has more bullets flying at me then I can shoot at them. Do not fret since this is American made in Texas no doubt you are not without aid.

      In the same passing to games old as the dodging killing rain, it includes power ups to take down the dastardly foes with deadly force. Each one that has it’s own strengths in weakness in using. The EMP Pulse disables the rain of lasers coming forth on you and the ships that are around, but the deal is it only shuts the ships down. You still need to shot the ships, so you can get lost in battle forget it is there and crash into it. The Reflecting Shield bounces the lasers back at them in the direction you are traveling, but if you don’t pay attention to the shield you get killed in the cross fire. Even the Giga Blaster is with faults even though whatever it shoots threw anything but is limited to a single line. Clearing one line may doom you by another.

      Each bit is ever increasing in difficulty with a new enemy added to the mix every couple of levels. The boss do get more and more difficult, even though killing them does not. Each boss has the X marks the spot to destroying it that is as plain as day, that makes killing them not so hard. The problem with them is like the small guys you fight to get there. Each stage has something new either in the number of incoming damage you have to avoid or just something else to look out for. Having to avoid nine rows of bullets you know will be there just to get blasted by the enemies Giga Blaster ship just because you didn’t notice it, which usually lead to swearing unleashing your hatred for the game blind siding you. The amount of times shouting fuck, shit, you mother fucker, and ect. your voice will either become horse or wish you knew more cuss words out of the boredom of repeating the same words over and over again.

      Now if this game wasn’t free I would say buy it for the seer challenge of it. Each little bit for either an accomplishment of beating the level or the achievements will be a joy. A good example as to why the achievements are tough is each must be done through a level of difficulty and not levels you beat. So something like beating the level of difficulty without dieing will be as aggravating as a hippie with a banjo for the amount of cussing caused by this free download. The kick in the bucket for someone is you have to have an internet connection to connect to Xbox Live with an account wither it be silver or gold. Which to some they may just be cussing the same amount as they would playing the game just because they lack that one connection. Though that does mean those with Gold instead of silver get something extra, multiplayer which means not only do you have extra help but you have extra moves to play the game with a friend. Something that Silver account users may be kicking themselves for simply because the game is more kick ass. Though with a second controller and the ability to smack your friend over the head if he fucks things up for you makes up for that fact easily.

      The game in a nut shell is side scrolling bullet hell fun, and yes I know this review has some spacers just to fill the length minimum that aren’t needed. This is one of those few games where it can be summed up easily. It’s challenging but hell all in the bullet hell games are. The whole challenge makes is so much more fun, which make a challenging game to review or play simply for that. Just playing for desire of fun is why it is such a good game to get, and you know what it’s free as well.

      Conclusion (Short recap + Pro and Con)

      Pros

      Feels like an arcade shooter
      Challenge that requires fast finger at the joystick


      Cons

      Bullet hell
      Tough to see where everything is

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
      Title: Guilty Gear XX #Reload

      http://cover6.cduniverse.com/MuzeGam.../92/665692.jpg

      Manufacturer: Arc System Works
      Publisher: Majesco Games (physical copy)
      Microsoft Game Studios (XBL)
      Platform: Xbox 360 (XBLA)
      Genre: Fighting
      Date Release: 2004-09-14 (XBOX)
      2008-06-16 (Xbox Originals)(XBL)
      Date Review: July 21 2008
      Review by Mykal Wane

      Rating T
      Gameplay 20/25
      Fun 25/25
      Sound 22/25
      Graphics 15/25
      Overall 4/5
      82/100


      (500 word minimum)
      2d side scrolling harks back to the days where we would spit out quarters into an arcade machine like a mutant would spit out acid with games like Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat. Now in a nut shell it does the job with itís button mashing action and impossible actions that mean if you face any Japanese person online your ass is grass. Which means you will have fun or a challenge against the uphill difficulty like Sisyphus seemingly endless for the button mashers or anyone who canít figure out what p s k or h is according to the controller. This is just the easiest level, so you can imagine the difficulty for normal can be.

      Now the challenge is something that may turn you into hating or loving the game. The difficulty of the game makes it fun whither alone or over Xbox Live. Something that unlike the Dead or Alive once it was out for Xbox it was lived enabled. Now since it has both multiplayer and single player aspects that make a mark for fun as well as getting your ass handed to you by a cheating pc characters that can do near godlike attacks that make the final boss in Dead or Alive look like a pussy in comparison, and not in the fun sex filled kind of way. Arcade mode is the best example of this.

      Arcade mode is as it sounds much like the old arcade games you simply have to beat the guy twice, and keep doing that to the end. Now each level and who you face changes based on what you choice up to a point and you get a score for how long it took you and how much life you have left. Now at the end you take on I-no the guitar wielding witch who just happens to be a bitch with impossible moves. Here is how to do her ultimate attack which she can pull on you multiple times which you canít do if you are her because you need to build up this energy called tension which you get from each successful hit.

      After pressing p, k , s, and b simultaneously press down, diagonal left down, right, down, diagonal left down right and h.

      How in the world do you simultaneously do that? Just to do half of that is near impossible, and you have to do it twice and at the same time. Itís a good thing that the unlockable do not depend on that. The problem is that you got the same challenge in Survival and Mission Mode.

      Survival Mode is basically how it sounds. You fight with the same character for so long and for fighting for so long you are rewarded with health. Now unlike regular fighting games where you have a just a steady growth of difficulty as you get further and further in the game you have Daredevil fights. Now in these Daredevil Matches you have the AI looking bad ass as well as the AI doing all it can, but limited to the same laws as you. The challenge goes up ten fold from whatever it was previously at. It is kick ass, even when you may get your ass kicked. When you are kicking ass instead for each smash into the other person you get to go up in level and the difficulty instead of in points. If you can get high enough you get unlockable character.

      Mission Mode is much like what it says you complete the mission with whatever limitations it has, with each complete mission you get free artwork. Sounds kind of cheap at times, but like with survival you do well enough you get a bad ass character. The kind that can take names very well. The deal is with this type of game mode to beat it you have to learn the in an outs of what your character can do. Often it takes just one certain move to pull beat it.

      For those that may think well that is nice, but that isnít enough well there is more to come just in the single player mode in Medal of Millionaire which turns fighting aspect into a who can get the highest score online as well as well as the story aspect which is rather interesting. The story mode does take on the same old same old aspect of moving a story along threw wining in a match. Sometimes you will have a generic storyline and other times will be tearing your hair out unable to beat this one guy just because you want to know what happens. It is at time ungodly difficult and sometimes easier then eating pie.

      The difficulty of the game itself has been one thing that at times makes the online experience sad at times. This is sad because most are just button mashing and compared to beating the AI itís facing an ant after you took off Robotic Godzilla with Mothra Wings. In most fights you get a good experience, not the best in the world but solid gameplay with a hick up once in awhile. Though you will once in awhile face a japanese guy who has mastered everything and make it impossible to hit as well.

      For a 2d fighting experience it beats the shit out of more graphic games like Dead or Alive because it focuses on having a great fighting game instead of pretty graphics. The insane amount of challenge to just master the control of a single character is a rewording experience on itís own. For each victory is rewarded in itís own way from either having the accomplishment beating someone or just artwork unlocked to view.

      Pros

      Always a challenge
      Single Player Gameplay for a Fighting Game that is good
      Online action

      Cons

      God like AI
      Near impossible movies
      The anime deal is an ad for the game not for an anime based on the game.

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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Video game: Gears of War
      Genre: Shooter

      System: Xbox 360

      Rating: M

      Date Release: 11/12/2006
      Date Review: 5/28/2008

      Manufacturer: Epic Games
      Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios

      Reviewed by MykalWane

      Rating Overall: 4/5
      for fans of the shooting genre:5/5

      Gameplay 20/25
      Fun 20/25
      Sound 18/25
      Graphics 23/25


      Main Story:
      Gears of War is a game for the let's go kill cats kind of game. It's heavy on the gore and less on the gameplay. Now this isn't saying that the gameplay isn't good, it just isn't the main focus of the game. The game is more for killing stuff, and finding new ways to do it. A game tailor made for the general Xbox fan boys since they enjoy killing stuff. Now this comes from Epic using the Unreal engine they are known for to power this game. This means the player is going to have a bad watch your mouth time. This can be told from the single fact that it's main selling point is a modern age bayonet with a chainsaw to slice and dice people.

      This is something that appears like everything with massive amounts of blood and gore. To the amount it will make many wonder how it didn't get slap with an AO rating as you play as Marcus Fenix, a former prisoner and war-hardened soldier. Anyone who plays this can tell from the fact that the game starts out with you getting release from solitary confinement to this third person game. Making you the bad ass character that must take on insurmountable odds, which for added bonus is the same voice as Bender. You can either jump into the fight or learn how to do things which is an added bonus since this allows people who are replying the game to skip the training they already know.

      The gameplay you learn from either training or getting into the fight is mostly duck and cover gameplay that seems to be the new "thing" in games for added difficulty. It allows the choice wither to go for a quick kill that saves ammo that risks death or fire from a covered position with bad accuriticy. Which adds difficulty in situation to the point it's like adding sprinkles on ice cream. The game gets tougher and tougher, but so much more enjoyable because of that. Simply because you are put in situations such as going against a turret gun where popping up to get a shot off will kill you. Now you may think I'll just pop up every so often but be aware of health in a situation like this. The game takes an interesting take on health by only showing what health you have when you get shot. So only when you get hurt do you know that, and it doesn't go the traditional route of telling you how much health you have left, but tells you how hurt your character is. So when it is fully hurt your character is dead.

      Now one might think with great gameplay would have a great story. Sadly along with appealing to the "let's kill something" audience that will buy this has little dept. The story is interesting since it really brings you into the action, but the story is like most action flicks. You're hear to kick ass and take names as you go from point a to point b to do something while killing stuff. In that respect it is a lot of fun, but it being a game that has a goal of being a tough game so that when you beat the game you feel like you have accomplished something. This is something that will make people hate this game, so if you looking for a deep storyline while going around killing stuff this isn't your game. The game as a whole does the same thing that a summer blockbuster does, it entertains while drawing you in. Now it does have some great bits, that make it a great shooter. Hell it pushes the genre of shooters ahead. Maybe not a full new direction, but it works on the same formula that Halo did. It brings new life into the genre by doing something different with the same old formula of killing stuff.

      Conclusion:

      Pros
      Blood, bullets, and guns show well
      Lots of things to shoot up in some new ways
      Cons
      No dept or story other then shot stuff
      Friends low iq, foe high iq




      Now for those of you think oh crap that means I just shoot and kill with no thought since it is only trying to entertain me, you're going to be disappointed. Most enemies think a bit, maybe not a lot at times you're trying to outwit them in a game of chess. It has added difficulty with some puzzles in how the hell am I going to survive this kinds of deal. The usual dark environment of horror that you get with the music that Kevin Riepl does a good job on. I personally don't think it is his best work since the guy likes to use horns a lot. They mix very well with the sound effects and everything, but the horns stood out more then blended. Still when you are working for having music mix well with bullets leaping from barrel to ground and all that the action going on. It does more to stand out then draw you into the action most of the time.

      That is just one of the minor faults the game has. The game overall is rather good and will test you as a gamer. The main thing is if you like killing stuff and a lot of blood you will love this game for them this game is a five chainsaws to the head with bloody action on single, co-op, or multiplayer. Now if you are not a fan of games that are for more blood then dept to a character this game is a 4. Not a must buy game for you, but a good rent that is rather enjoyable that you should cheek out. This is a game I suggest that you rent first. Not only because this is a game that isn't a must buy for everyone, but because the game's difficulty is a love or hate ordeal. This may make you scream and cuss till you are put away in an insane asylum, or be a game you love like sex or life. I personally love the fact the game is constantly challenging me as I play, but this is something you may not like. As a game in the shooting genre this game isn't my favorite, but it is a bloody good time that will make you wish you could chainsaw your best friend in the face. It is that much fun to chainsaw someone, and the game is that. A fun time, which some can get the same enjoyment out of renting the game for a week as someone else playing it for a lifetime.

    13. #43
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      Mykalwane's Avatar
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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Attempting a Halloween poem.

      Pitter patter, things a matter.
      Rather splatter, comes a batter.

      Aim for sky, stay alive.
      Cast the die, hit aline.

      Whack, whack, whack,
      head goes slack.

      The dial goes awhile.
      sick dread rise a smile.

      Bile in style, with mind compile.
      Guile of spiel, with head hostile.

      Tonight rings tight, neck in vice.
      Concise slice entice trice is price.

    14. #44
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      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Pretty much something I came up to entertain a kid while I helped her parents. Pretty much what I said she was repeating it. So keep it silly and simple. Its horrible, but I keep smiling every time I think of it. So putting it up.

      Its Entertainment

      Zappy wappy dappy rappy kappy
      Bing bang bong song wong kong

      Long wrung bun tun lung
      bung wong don sun done.

    15. #45

      Re: [CL] Some poems and junk

      Hi Mykalwane, Ages ago I said I would come and review something and I never did. Bad bad mr burton. I am however here and ready. Having read Reines critiquing rants I thought I would get stuck in.
      I figured I would look at one of your poems and one of your reviews.

      I picked Gossip. I clicked on it because of the title, on whim. Why not. I really like it. I like the rhythm. What I'm going to try and do is find things I don't like things that could improve...

      Beyond the flight of the night.
      Little specks filled with fright.

      Whispers in the ear, my dear.

      Simple they may, spread dismay.
      Tear out the heart, put it on display.

      The devilish tongue, break where they belong.

      Simple word, seem a blur.
      Turning all, into a slur.
      ~

      I like the simplicity of it. Gossip in it's nature is a simple thing but potentially very damaging so it works. A few words here a few there bam- someone ruined or in tears.
      The few changes from the above I would make are:

      Though simple, they may spread dismay.
      Tear out the heart, put it on display.

      I just felt that way it seemed to make more sense and fit the rhythm a little better.

      in the last couplet you need to change word or seem into words or seems. This is dependant on whether or not you are trying to place emphasis on how little actually needs to be said to cause trouble if that makes sense. My opinion would be words in which case, for the spoken rhythm, I would add the word they for pronunciation.
      Thus it becomes

      Simple words, they seem a blur.
      Turning all into a slur.

      I would lose the comma in that last line.


      This line:
      The devilish tongue, break where they belong.

      I feel it should change but I don't know how. It sticks out as odd and out of place but at once seems to sum it all up. I honestly don't know what to suggest perhaps others may have an idea. It just doesn't quite sit well with me. It's between tongue, break. It feels quite blunt. I don't mean semantically i mean phonetically the sound is blunt and sloppy. I dont know how to explain it but say it aloud and you feel a little like you are tripping over yourself which is a shame given the steady rhythm and pace of the rest of the piece.

      Now, Im going to go and read a review...
      Last edited by craigatron; 10-12-2012 at 05:29 PM. Reason: taking away an s from seems....
       

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