Mr & Mrs AL-Mas - ROUND TWO! "How I saved Christmas"

[Ferefire]

Challenge 2 going up tomorrow, folks! Finish getting those photos up quick!

[Ferefire]

@Ivan @Narnia @pervysage100 @Ludejano Elta @Sailor Luna @Sabriel @Jakk @Stephuu @Jefferus @radical ed @CazzyLove @Kaida Mizu @FemaleTengu

Round Two! Post your speeches in here NOW! You have until 24th!

[radical ed]

how i will save christmas

ladies and gentlemen, i come before you today for one reason only: to save christmas. if i was in charge of this wonderous holiday, it would be way cooler. everybody gets a mattel hover board like in back to the future 2, which is by far the least greatest of the trilogy, but i digress. naughty children will not get coal, but instead get pocket lint and shoe strings, or maybe a toy with no batteries included. i am not the best at writing speeches, but i hope you consider that i am pretty awesome and have boobs. thank you, and good night.

[Starcry]

How I will save Christmas:

Not that it is really worth saving, but this is how I have saved Christmas. I saved it by buying some time warp dust. Yes I bought time warp dust. How does this save Christmas? and just what the fuck is time warp dust? I hear some of you ask! Well this is how: On Christmas day at around dinner time I shall sprinkle this dust. This dust will then magically make the song "Time warp" play on loop in everyone's homes, and summon a load of whorish looking transvestites, who will go round knocking on everyone's doors and make them come out and dance. I will then sneak into everyone's homes and eat all the brussels sprouts everyone seems to despise at this time of year! Then to top it off I shall use the ammo the sprouts gave me to punish the bad people who gave crappy presents!

If this isn't good enough to save Christmas then eh... screw it. Have this song to keep you happy at this time of year:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3Cdqx1qFX8

*Bows*

Thank you~ ,3

[Sabriel]

@Ferefire Please can you take me out of this contest completely as I have no computer access at home and I am off work for 2 weeks after today so I have no way to take part.

[Effie-Chan]

How will I save christmas

Okay so I'm gonna be saying that one way I would save christmas is by getting rid of government and hand money to majority of poor famalies so this year they can have a nice christmas. I then would organise a day where people would spend the day thinking about the fact you don't give to recieve that you give because you want to. How this would save christmas, well the top one mainly because it will give disadvantage famalies a chance to actually celebrate christmas like most famalies do, not just with family but with presents to. The second one will save christmas because then people won't be rushing around thinking they want to get a present for say a really welathy person just cause they want an expensive gift :/

but yeah it's not much I know xx

[Ivan]

i'm going to destroy christmas forever

if not allowed to destroy christmas forever

i'll fuck you until you die

your pick

[Starcry]

Mike really needs to find a way in which we can "Like" posts...

[Jakk]

We had that. It was removed.

[Ivan]

i just use the Thank function for that shit

[CazzyLove]

How I saved Christmas:
I saved it by bringing back Christmas Spirit, Christmas Magik and The True Meaning of the holiday. Everyone these days is obsessed with material good, but the holiday is about Love, Peace and Hope. Not about how much is spent on you or how much you spend on someone else. I brought back children smiling as they write a letter to Santa, children singing Christmas carols to spread the joy. But most of all I brought back care, not caring what they look like or what others think of them, but caring about others, people less fortunate then them, their families, their friends.

And that is how I saved Christmas

[Jakk]

Well, a few months ago, my wife moved out to LA (we lived in New York at the time) for a job. I couldn't go with her because I was bogged down with work, which led to us having kind of a big fight, so I wound up never going out there. Well, this Christmas, her company was having a Christmas party, so she went ahead and invited me. After all these months, I really missed her, so I figured "Sure, why not?" and I flew out to see her. Well as soon as I get in, I'm picked up by this cab driver she sent. Guess that job of hers is working out pretty well, she's now the second in command at a HUGE corporate center and moving up quickly. Anyway, I guess when I finally saw her I was still kind of bitter about the whole thing, and we got off to a rocky start, and had to take a breather for a minute.

That's when I started to hear gunshots.

Well I wasn't sure what else to do, so I just grabbed my piece and ran across the hall to the stair well to avoid the shooters. It was stupid, I really should have grabbed my shoes first. Anyway, it turns out that the shooting was a bunch of terrorists who wanted to hold the building hostage. I saw them take my wife's boss into another room and execute him when he wouldn't give them the password to the computer network (I guess they brought their own laptops and wanted to surf porn while they waited for their demands or something). Well, I'm not going to just sit around while they beat their dicks, so I start trying to signal for help. First I pull a fire alarm, and it seems to be working, but they must have called it off because I could see the fire trucks turn around and head back to the station. That just made one of the terrorists come up after me and attack me. I managed to fight him off, and I tried not to kill him in the process, but I guess you can't win 'em all. His shoes didn't fit me, but he DID have some smokes and a decent MP5, so I was like, "I can make do." So I did what any smart guy would do and put him in the elevator with a message for the bad guys. That helped me overhear a little bit of their conversation, so I took a radio and went to the roof to try and signal dispatch. Some dumb lady picked up and told me I was unauthorized to be talking to her (yeah, sure, this isn't an emergency or anything), but she DID send over one squad car to see what was up. I hoped that would be enough, but it wasn't. Dumb guy just got in and started trying to drive off. Hell no, I ain't havin' that. I threw a dead terrorist out the window and started shooting around his car. THAT worked.

From there everything got a little confusing. Some giant pretty guy got mad that I killed his brother or pissed in his juice box or something, and he kept coming after me with a steyr all night. A bunch of cops showed up, and the swat team did a bunch of stupid shit that I told them they really shouldn't even try to do, and it nearly got them killed. Good thing I was there to back them up. Then the FBI showed up, and things just got worse. I gashed my foot pretty bad on some broken glass, the pretty guy shot me a couple times, and it turns out the terrorists weren't really terrorists at all, they were just after some cash that was in the company vault. The terrorist thing was just a ruse to put all of the hostages on the roof and blow them up, so everybody would figure the thieves were dead and nobody would ever track down the hundreds of millions of dollars they stole. Meanwhile, the FBI guys decided the hostages were expendable and just wanted to snipe some terrorists from a helicopter (as if that's a good idea or something).

In the end, I managed to get the hostages off of the roof before it got blown up, so the only people who got hurt were the FBI guys who kept shooting at me. But the leader of the terrorists figured out who my wife was and decided he was going to take her with him, so I had to deal with him personally. Close call, but I managed to pull it off, and before I knew it my wife was right back in my arms where she belonged, and the bad guy kind took the express elevator to the ground floor if you know what I mean.

So I saved the hostages, I killed the bad guy, and I got the girl. I should probably get to a hospital or something, but I really just want to have a cigarette and then go spend some time with my family. Did I mention I brought a giant teddy bear for my daughter? And we're gonna roll up to the house in a limo. Kind of a dinged up limo, I'm not sure what the hell the driver was up to while I was at the party, but hey, a limo's a limo.

And that's how I saved Christmas.

[Ferefire]

Since we're feeling generous, Round 3 shall be tomorrow on 26th!

[Jakk]

what happen