Hypothetical - Your feedback.

[Cyclone Bill]

Your girlfriend has a lifelong friend who recently broke up with her boyfriend, this ex-boyfriend refuses to move out of the home she grew up in, works at the same company she does and has been quite the asshole.

When the two broke up, the ex broke her driver side mirror and knocked her to the ground with a slap, held her down and rubbed the soles of his shoes on her face whilst calling her a filthy slut. Foolishly enough, this 19 year old girl thinks she can give him a couple months to either calm down or move out because "love is stronger than hate".

Living only a few minutes down the road from your girlfriend's best mate, you are often there with all three, on a regular basis so you're often called down to calm down arguments or hang out even without your girlfriend present. Now that they have broken up with him living there on a trial basis to see if he will calm down, you pay a visit to her with your girlfriend whilst the ex is away at work to see how she is. Everything goes well, you play some SNES, you watch a couple movies and have a lot of fun.

You realize you've forgotten something a couple hours after having visited and you return with your girlfriend and her best mate to your house to retrieve it. As you pull out of the street in your car, the friend receives a phone-call from her ex-boyfriend asking where she is. You pass it off as coincidence when both your girlfriend and her best mate start theorizing that he knew she left because someone was watching the house.

You return to the house, and realise it's about 3AM. Regardless of the time, you play more SNES and have more fun. At about 4:30AM, everyone decides they are hungry so you all jump into the car and start off to McDonalds. It's when you pull out of the drive way you see a guy sitting across the street from your friend's house with all his lights off, hands on the wheel, engine dead just staring straight ahead. Your friend sees the guy and thinks she recognizes him and asks you to pull out of the drive way in such a way that you have to pass the strangers car. It is when you begin to pass this person that your friend realizes the person sitting outside of her house in a car with all the lights turned off is her ex-boyfriend's uncle.

The second the stranger realizes that your friend has spotted him, he turns over his engine, puts pedal to the metal and takes off down the street wheels screeching and smoking. You follow him a little bit, then turn off at your destination only to hear your friend's mobile ringing, her ex-boyfriend on the line asking where she is and what she is doing.

How do you react? What do you do?

Edit: They broke up for good last night, he came to the house this morning and violently shoved his ex onto the floor. This gave me justification to throw him down the flight of stairs that lead to the front door and pull my Shinai on him, he will never come back. Situation resolved!

[Moulders]

"I'm at McDonalds, eating. By the way I spotted your uncle earlier, looked like he was stalking someone. That can't be healthy."

[Starcry]

"Have you heard of an order of protection? Well I figured I'd pop down to the police station with a few witnesses and get one for you and your family!"

Just messing. But seriously. I'd tell her to play along casually like she would usually, but not to give off she knows he got a family member to stalk her. As she answers the phone drive to the local police station. If I got there before she finished I'd wait until the call finished. If my girlfriend didn't I would then urge her to report this all to the police, and offer her all the support she wants and needs to get through this. If this works then we'd then go into police station and ask to see someone about reporting an incident, and ask about getting a restraining order. I'd then sit with my girlfriend's friend and support her through it all. (If she wanted me there that is.) However if she refuses to report this then I'll pretty much remind her of everything that's happened thus far and how things usually go down if they aren't stopped. Still not work? Ask what she would do if she were in my girlfriends shoes. Still not work? Drive her back home. I would then drive to the station myself the next day and ask for advice.

[Jakk]

I don't think this hypothetical situation is very hypothetical at all. It's also really, really easy to solve. Call the police, get a restraining order.

[Cyclone Bill]

"Have you heard of an order of protection? Well I figured I'd pop down to the police station with a few witnesses and get one for you and your family!"

Just messing. But seriously. I'd tell her to play along casually like she would usually, but not to give off she knows he got a family member to stalk her. As she answers the phone drive to the local police station. If I got there before she finished I'd wait until the call finished. If my girlfriend didn't I would then urge her to report this all to the police, and offer her all the support she wants and needs to get through this. If this works then we'd then go into police station and ask to see someone about reporting an incident, and ask about getting a restraining order. I'd then sit with my girlfriend's friend and support her through it all. (If she wanted me there that is.) However if she refuses to report this then I'll pretty much remind her of everything that's happened thus far and how things usually go down if they aren't stopped. Still not work? Ask what she would do if she were in my girlfriends shoes. Still not work? Drive her back home. I would then drive to the station myself the next day and ask for advice.

There are a few reasons why the police cannot be involved without getting her in trouble(not related to this situation) also, I probably should've mentioned that. Nothing that would get her shot by police but enough that it would be hard to convince her to go to the police in the first place.

I'm a little worried that she won't let anything official get involved in this situation and her ex will end up hurting her and fucking off back to Saudi Arabia before anyone can report what has happened. I do have to say, he has threatened to do exactly that before but she doesn't believe he would hurt her like that.

[Jakk]

Well that isn't any information at all, you're going to have to give us more than that.

[Sabata]

Try and convince her to just completely remove the guy from her life and hope he listens and takes his creepy uncle with him. If she refuses to try and get rid of him, or if he refuses to leave her alone, in addition to her unwillingness to go to the police, I don't see much else that any of us could tell you to do that would be effective and legal.

[Cyclone Bill]

Try and convince her to just completely remove the guy from her life and hope he listens and takes his creepy uncle with him. If she refuses to try and get rid of him, or if he refuses to leave her alone, in addition to her unwillingness to go to the police, I don't see much else that any of us could tell you to do that would be effective and legal.

That's exactly how I've been trying to get things handled. My girlfriend and I have been trying to convince her to allow us to help her evict the guy. However, I thought my girlfriend and her were being idiots when they said she was being stalked until I saw it myself. All I was able to do was tailgate the shit out of the guy who was out front her house to try to scare him away.

Well that isn't any information at all, you're going to have to give us more than that.

She's got problems with the law basically relating to the fact that one of her brothers lent this guy his medicare card to help him out with the cost of prescription medicine, etc. That's a big no no, this guy isn't even a citizen. He doesn't even have residency. I told her not to do it and I refused when they asked for my old card. There are also other minor offenses that the pair of them have committed trying to make life easier for themselves.

[Jakk]

Okay, so let me piece this together and see if I understand what you're telling me, since I don't really know Australian law very well.

What you are suggesting that we few sane GD posters should believe, is that the police will refuse to protect you from stalking and physical assault, because this chick's BROTHER committed a medically related white collar crime?

[Cyclone Bill]

Okay, so let me piece this together and see if I understand what you're telling me, since I don't really know Australian law very well.

What you are suggesting that we few sane GD posters should believe, is that the police will refuse to protect you from stalking and physical assault, because this chick's BROTHER committed a medically related white collar crime?

No, they will just make her life a living hell, hit her brother with fines and likely take her housing from her. I can't exactly make a police report on her behalf, unless she goes to the police herself or allows me to take her to the police, it isn't an option. There are other reasons she has for not going to the police, as I said before nothing life ending but certainly not pleasant for a 19 year old girl.

[Jakk]

Consult a lawyer. Private lawyers (if they have them on your god-forsaken continent) protect the client first, and will be able to explain to you exactly what you stand to lose by talking to the police, on top of what they will be able to do for your protection. Since you aren't giving us any details at all, I'm not convinced you actually know what's going to happen if you get the police involved (which is always the right thing to do when you are talking about someone stalking and physically assaulting other people).

Or just wait until you see the uncle's car out there again, and do the whole anonymous neighbor phone call on a suspicious person.

[Cyclone Bill]

Or just wait until you see the uncle's car out there again, and do the whole anonymous neighbor phone call on a suspicious person.

This is pretty much the only thing I can do, aside from trying to get my girlfriend to pester her mate into evicting her ex.

[Starcry]

I know the Auzzy lot can be hard arses when it comes to the law. But I am sure if you, your gf and her friend and bro all deny knowledge of it happening and just say all her bro knows is at one point his medical card kept going missing things will be fine. That is if the subject even comes up. Which I highly doubt because Mr Psycho would be incriminating himself in the process. Plus it will get him deported and all that lovely jazz. A lot worse than what will happen to her or her brother. Use this argument to win her over. Also tell her if she doesn't do anything soon she'll end up a lot worse than she is now. Because his behavior is not that of a normal sane person. It is boarder-lining that of a psychopath. And the next step will be her ending up in hospital. He has already harmed her once. What is stopping him doing it again and doing worse while he is at it?

Also from how this guy sounds I don't think direct confrontation will get anyone anywhere. So no asking to leave. He'll most likely flip a lid and it will definitely make things a hell of a lot worse. He knows he has her under his control. The moment she shows other wise he will not be happy, and most likely lash out.

As far as I know... no matter what your criminal past is (unless you did something massive.) the police have to treat all victims equally. Right now she is the victim of a serious crime. So unless she has served prison sentence for something major just go to the cops, or like Jakk says go to private lawyer and get advice on what to do next.

*Edit*

Here is some information on Stalking:

http://homepage.psy.utexas.edu/homep...kingWhyAm.html
http://law.jrank.org/pages/10451/Stalking.html

[Cyclone Bill]

I know the Auzzy lot can be hard arses when it comes to the law. But I am sure if you, your gf and her friend and bro all deny knowledge of it happening and just say all her bro knows is at one point his medical card kept going missing things will be fine. That is if the subject even comes up. Which I highly doubt because Mr Psycho would be incriminating himself in the process. Plus it will get him deported and all that lovely jazz. A lot worse than what will happen to her or her brother. Use this argument to win her over. Also tell her if she doesn't do anything soon she'll end up a lot worse than she is now. Because his behavior is not that of a normal sane person. It is boarder-lining that of a psychopath. And the next step will be her ending up in hospital. He has already harmed her once. What is stopping him doing it again and doing worse while he is at it?

Also from how this guy sounds I don't think direct confrontation will get anyone anywhere. So no asking to leave. He'll most likely flip a lid and it will definitely make things a hell of a lot worse. He knows he has her under his control. The moment she shows other wise he will not be happy, and most likely lash out.

As far as I know... no matter what your criminal past is (unless you did something massive.) the police have to treat all victims equally. Right now she is the victim of a serious crime. So unless she has served prison sentence for something major just go to the cops, or like Jakk says go to private lawyer and get advice on what to do next.

*Edit*

Here is some information on Stalking:

http://homepage.psy.utexas.edu/homep...kingWhyAm.html
http://law.jrank.org/pages/10451/Stalking.html

Consulting a lawyer is a great idea, and getting her away from him is probably the best bet. I probably should've mentioned he acted all cool about her being "Aussie"(not held in a harem) but has been getting more and more "religious" the worse their relationship has gotten. Thus the shoes across her face thing, I dunno. The whole religious thing is worrying me, this whole situation is ridiculous. The feedback I've gotten has given me slightly more confidence this can be handled above board, thanks guys.

[Starcry]

Have her stay at your girlfriends or something until this whole mess blows over. I know this sounds cruel of me to say but sounds like he was having her as his (and his family's) ticket into being a legal citizen.

I wish you luck and hope the situation gets resolved.